Ernie PanosHere is a picture of our very own Ernie Panos sporting and styling in the new custom fit 2 button golf shirt with the “Gelly’s Golf School”  logo.  Apparently, Ernie is Bill Gelsomino’s only student at his much maligned golf school.

Question of the week.     Tell us what the golfer depicted  in the logo on Ernie’s shirt is doing and win a sleeve of golf balls.  First correct answer wins.    Hint – Click a few times on the picture to enlarge it.   Note:  Ernie Panos and Bill and Derrick Gelsomino  are ineligible.



The o

Bill Gelsomino welcomes all to the league opening dinner on March 26th

Bill Gelsomino welcomes all to the league opening dinner on March 26th

pening dinner and meeting for the 2015 Thursday Night Triggs Golf League is scheduled for Thursday March 26, 2015 @ 6:30 pm at the Kelly Gazzerro VFW Post, 1418 Plainfield Pike, Cranston, RI.  Please enter through the rear of the building.   At that time, dinner and drinks on the league will be served, teams will be selected and the league format, rules and all stupid questions will be answered.  Please bring your dues in the amount of $160.00 payable to the “Thong League Golf Association” with you to the meeting.  If you have any questions in the interim, please call  (255-3478) or e-mail ( ) Steve Placella.

We now have 32 players committed at this time to play this season.  The league is now full and complete.   REMEMBER!!!   Jim Hunter, the “Guinea Slayer” has returned after negotiating a 1 year contract which included a substantial bonus.

Vin “Maggott” LaFazia. Welcomes you to the meeting.    Bill Gelsomino wii be giving a sand trap lesson at the meeting as well.image


Vin “Maggot” Lafazia

Vin LaFazia continues his wizardry as he notched his 3rd consecutive annual victory at the Highland Woods Golf & Country Club in Bonita Springs, Florida where he an his lovely wife are members.

Vin LaFazia continues his wizardry as he notched his 3rd consecutive annual victory at the Highland Woods Golf & Country Club in Bonita Springs, Florida where he an his lovely wife are members.


Tournament ResultsTournament Skin PoolTournament ScorecardsPlayoff Results:    Dan “Pretty Boy” DeQuattro and his point machine partner, Garry Reilly, cruised to a playoff victory over the beleaguered Al Cotoia.   Due to self appointed playoff commissioner, Bill Gelsomino’s crazy playoff formula, Cotoia was placed at a significant disadvantage in the finals when he had to play without his partner, Rick Guerra.  Cotoia and Guerra who each took back to back two week trips to Italy causing the shorthanded team, were each heard to voice their complaints to Gelsomino  in Italian and with a final one fingered salute hand gesture.  For their playoff victory, each of the victors have won a personalized prize.  “Pretty Boy” has won a year of free electrolosis and waxing at Francesco’s Salon in Johnston, RI.  Francesco has indicated that he will personally apply the hot wax to Dan’s delicate areas.  Garry, on the other hand, in keeping with his long held contention that the Thong League is screwing him is getting an empty envelope for his efforts.


TOURNAMENT  RESULTS:   Johnson’s Johnsons defeat LaFazia’s Lunatics 14 1/2 points to 11 1/2 points.   In a hard fought match at the Alpine Country Club, Bob Johnson led his hard charging band of Johnsons to victory over Vin LaFazia’s Lunatics.    The individual points earned by each player are listed in green.

The Closest to the Pin winners were as follows:   Hole #12 – Slick Wardick;    Hole #6 – Fran Chatelle;    Hole #12 – Jim Meikle;     Hole #15 – Mike Taveras

The Skin Winners were as follows:   Steve Placella – Hole #2 – #5 Hdcp;    Dennis Ryan #15 – #18 Hdcp (only birdie in “B” division)

The Skills Competition Winners were as follows:   60 Yard Shot:  Bob Johnson – hole out;  Longest Drive: Ken Mason – 312 yards;  Putting Contest – Steve Richtarik; Greenside Bunker Shot:  Al Cotoia

The results of the other matches are listed above.

League Regular Season Team Awards:  1st Place Team:  Vin “Maggott” LaFazia & Bob Moretti;    2nd Place Team:  Bill “Swing Change” Gelsomino  &  Andy  “where’s my “A” partner” Constant;  

3rd Place Team:  Steve “Statman” Richtarik  &  George “the Buffalo Hunter” Benjamin

League Regular Season Individual Awards  “A” Division:  1st Place Points:  Ken Mason (71.5); 2nd Place Points:  Bill Gelsomino (69);  3rd Place Points:  Vin Lafazia (66)

League Regular Season Individual Awards  “B”  Division:  1st Place Points:  Andy Constant (73);  2nd Place Points:  George Benjamin (69);  3rd Place Points:  Bob Moretti (68)

League Superlatives:   Best Dressed;  Fran Chatelle;      Perfect Attendance:  Ernie Panos         








The league tournament scheduled for September 7, 2014 has been moved to the Alpine Country Club!!!   Tee Time is 12:30 pm.   Practice rang and putting green are available to our group prior to our round.  Locker room and showers are available as well.

League Skills Competitions will take place immediately after the round.

Dinner consisting of  3 pasta stations, grilled pizza and calamari  will  follow the Skills Competition!!!

DEQUATTRO. and. REILLY  Tag team  AL. COTOIA  and rolled to a playoff finals victory

Playoff Results Week #3

Playoff Results Week 32014 League Tournament Teams Playoff Results Week #3


PLAYOFF  RESULTS   WEEK  1   8.14.2014

Matches of the Week #14

Bill Gelsomino v.  Steve Richtarik -  This will match the top players from  their teams in a battle over the last three weeks of the season for league supremacy.  At present, very little separates these teams.  You can bet that Steve “Statman” Richtarik, who wet his pants in a double match last week, will have a favorable handicap determination for this match.  Gelsomino, who wouldn’t give strokes to a coprse, will be chafing over giving the long hitting “Statman” any candy in this one.  Lucklily they will only see each other on the tees and greens as the  wannabe long hitter Gelsomino will be hitting 3-4 longer clubs into the greens in this one.

Vin LaFazia  v.  Ray Castigliego – The slow moving LaFazia, who was unbeaten in league play until very recently, will take on the consistent Castigliego in an attempt to keep his team at the top of the league heap.  Both players are very consistent and veterans of match play pressure.  So this should be a very hard fought match.

George Benjamin  v.  Andy Constant – This match should be a doozy.  Provided that the volatile and forgetful Benjamin gets delivered to the course on time by the RIDE van, George should be dropping F-bombs and lobbing clubs from the 10th to the 18th hole.  George, who neither knows Andy’s name nor recognizes him as a member of the league, will be wondering why he doesn’t have a match this week.  Andy, on the other hand, has recently succumbed to the pressures of match play and the unrelenting pressure from his captain, Bill Gelsomino.  He has vowed to kick George’s “old, wrinkly ass” from one end of Triggs to the other.  Andy, who considers himself the real “A” player of his team, is just itching to show Captain Gelly who is the real ace of the team.


One (1) person, male, not quite 50 years old.  Likes to eat.  No longer smokes.  Great conversationalist.  Not too ugly.  Has gained weight.  Has a very religious, Italian mother who will make food.  Has tried his hand at golf for a number of years but has been forceably retired from the game.  This offer comes with nearly new golf clubs, irons and driver.  These clubs have never, ever, ever  been hit on the sweet spot.  There also might be a few Titleist Pro Vs or NXTs left in his bag but don’t count on it.  They are probably lost with the rest of his balls.  He may have other redeeming qualities but we really haven’t found any.  All interested please send an e-mail.Florida Golf 2003 021


Bill Gelsomino  vs.   Ken Mason -  The brash, but short hitting,  Bill Gelly has been on a streak lately.  Much like Mohammed Ali in his early years, Gelly was telling all who would listen that he was going to destroy Slick Wardick last week.  Guess what.  He spanked the Slickster from one of Triggs to the other.  Even the ghost of the long departed Donald Ross  raised an eyebrow and took note.  Now, Gelly who for weeks,  has been calling out rookie phenom, Ken Mason, has his sights set firmly on Mason and their match this Thursday.  Gelly’s party however, was spoiled last week as the extremely methodical Vin Lafazia handed Ken his first loss of the year.  Gelly now wants to extend Ken’s losing streak and has not been shy about telling Ken.  Ken to his credit has been closed lipped about the match.  BUT,  Thong League Privacy Violation Expert, John Graham, overheard Ken Mason tell another league member that “I am going to punish that fool”.  In fact, Ken was heard to say that “that loudmouth’s  grip is a joke, his setup is a joke and each of his recent 237 swing changes are all jokes”.  “I am going to kick his old ass from hole #s 10 to 18!  He is not even a has been.  He is a wannabe has been!”


Slick Wardick   vs.  Bob Johnson -  Another brash talking member of the Thong League feels he has a point to prove.  That’s right!  Slick Wardick, still reeling from an unprecedented ass kicking served up over 5 days in Florida this past November, has continued his rapid descent causing him to hit the ground with a loud thud after being clubbed into submission by Bill Gelly last week.  In fact, Wardick was taken to the hospital for observation of concussive symptoms for taking too many blows to the head in their match.  His opponent,  none other than the gentleman, Bob Johnson.  Bob has been on a recent tear lately never before seen in Thong League annals.  His swing is smooth and his irons are accurate.  Odds are that the only way Wardick will have a chance in this match is for him to try to intimidate the mild mannered, littleneck loving Johnson.  Johnson has said that he is having none of Wardick’s thug tactics.  Johnson said that “if I was tough enough to elbow Jim “the Guinea Slayer” Hunter away from the grilled littlenecks at Dan Deinzer’s Lobsterfest a couple of years ago, I can most certainly handle a “lightweight” like Wardick”.